Viewing the opinionated world through my ten year old sunglasses !!

Few days back I realised that the sunglasses I have been wearing have been with me for the past 10 years. I had bought them just before my trip to doha and its been 10 yrs for trip to doha and that is how realisation dawned on me !!... I started making judgements about me. I do preserve things. I value money . I am a responsible person and so on... And then I realised that there are other instances in my life which disprove all of the judgements I just made about my self. I thought let me test my judgements with my friends and family. and so I posted on whats app groups and social media. And to my surprise I got even more amazing judgements and opinions not just about me but what I should doing about it.

judgements about me : borderline OCD , responsible by birth , old fashioned , minimalist, I stay indoors don't venture out in the sun

doubts /further Analysis : how many sunglasses do I own ? how much time were these in the closet as they look new

advice : sell it on olx , give it to charity , good advertisement for polaroid , time to upgrade my fashion sense, keep it for another 10 years and they become antique

comparison : You are responsible but I am not.

Social Media instigates others to 'React' . Form opinions and Judgements quickly about a person or an event. 'Like' , 'Love' , 'Comment' are all opinions. 

When I was growing up the connect was with classmates, locality friends, cousins ,teachers etc and their opinions and judgements have shaped me in my growing years. Now through social media not only am I friend's friend but also I am connected with most of the people I ever met in life. And they will 'comment' , pass a judgement on my statements. So the volume of opinions and judgements has just amplified in my life.

So how in this crazy opinion obsessed new world do I see myself and accept myself ? 

I feel this calls for a case for self-awareness. I realised that because I know myself and have spent a good amount of time on self-reflection I can choose to let the opinions and judgement affect me, If I see value in what the person is saying I will choose to learn from it. Now a days I choose to provide an opinion or a judgement only when asked for. Sometimes with close friends I take the liberty but give the choice to my friends to listen or not.This choice  has developed over a period of time with practice and awareness of my thoughts and other people's thoughts.

I wish the practice of self-awareness and contemplative practices are taught in school so that we become more aware of our own actions and act only when needed.

With the statement of my sunglasses being 10 year old , I got so many opinions , judgements and advice which I never asked for. I feel if I live and speak from self awareness then I will not hurt another with my opinions and judgement and will not be hurt by others opinions about me and there will be a silence where we all see each other as we are.There will be peace !!.

This reminds me of Rumi's quote which is a befitting ending to this post.

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing  and right doing there is a field.I'll meet you there.”

I am willing to meet you there . Are you ?

My Lost found wonder

I had a childhood friend named wonder

We marvelled at things for hours together

We gazed at the star filled sky all night and watched the leaves flutter and butterflies fly in broad daylight

We named the clouds as they took shape and danced in the rain till the paper boats drained

The rainbows sprinkled the colours of life as we watched the puddles form from rain’s delight

Then the day came for me to be more civil

I was asked to leave wonder and step inside

I listened obediently and responsibly stepped inside

I stepped inside a box and tried to fit in somehow

I learnt what they taught and I followed the books they brought

Opinions and judgement became my new found friends

Facts and figures became the dearest of the lot

And I completely lost myself in the noise of these loud proud friends

Life became a drag and joy lost its way to me and I became the unknown face in my own mirror

Then one fine day a search began

A search began to find me back

I searched within to find my way home and took paths which I had never treaded before

I walked and walked across countries, across cultures, across experiences

And reached the depths of grief and the lows of sorrow

Drowned and swayed, found and lost, I slowly drifted away from the noise of the crowd

The voices of opinions and judgements faded away and now I do not hear them a lot

The silence became my home for a while, where I slept and rested from the tiredness of wandering all about

From the silence of my home came a knock on the door one day

I opened the door and there I saw my friend wonder stretching its arm and asking me to play and ponder once again

From my silent home I listened now loud and clear to my friend whisperings and signing in my ears

Together we took the paths which we never treaded before

Reached the depths of awe and highs of new unknowns

Joy is back and so is fun in voice and eyes shine with the new potential of life

And heart beats its choice as I cherish both within and outside spaces with wonder

Wonder stays with me now in my silent new home

And once in a while we step outside to write a poem, sing a song or dance together, or just lay still and marvel at nature.

The woody path to an eco-living

 

All walk the path

Some walk a path together

Some follow blindly while others lead blindly

Few wake up to light

Fewer choose to turn the back

Fewer still choose to astray

One creates a new path of hope

This brave hearted and strong willed changes the course of destiny

A new world is created

And then all walk the path…..

 

Seven or eight years back I woke up from deep sleep!! I woke up to the fact that I am not only my thoughts. I woke up to the fact that I have been living a life scripted by society. I woke up from the auto-pilot monotonous rhythm of machine world into a world full of life’s wonder. It’s ironical, the more I connect with myself, the more I become aware of other’s and a beautiful universe surrounding me. As the old structures crumbled in front me, I started asking the question for the very first time in my life ‘Who am I truly? What inspires me? What nourishes my soul? And the questionioning continues each day every way. As the energy of conflict freed up within me and I became a potentiality of possibilities I started asking the question, how do I serve this planet and how can I tread lightly on earth? This search has led me to a small eco home near Petersfield in UK where a colleague of mine Richard Bates has been living for 6 years. Richard lives in a shack house created by him with natural light windows in the roof. Richard generates his own solar energy using solar panels. How many of us get this opportunity to actually create our own house? His next step in the ecological path is to grow his own food through organic farming. Richard earns a living by doing wood craft workshops which I was fortunate enough to attend as a guest.

Spending the last weekend at Richard’s eco home I learnt the following life lessons:

1)      It takes courageous heart to follow a less travelled road:

When I asked Richard what inspired him to live like this? His answer was a very matter of fact statement. ‘I spent a lot of time in the countryside in my late teens that is when my mom moved out of the town to the country. My main drive to live this lifestyle is the desire to shift to a land based self-sufficient lifestyle and an ambition to build my own home’.  Humbleness and humility is what struck me the most when I first met Richard. It takes courage to live not only for you but for others too. A country like UK (23^rd amongst the world’s richest countries) provides a good lifestyle to its average citizen. Richard had the choice to choose luxuries but instead he chose to live a life of voluntary simplicity.

2)      There is more to life than just increasing it’s speed:

Being a city girl, have lived on the edge of a dial watch every day. Making fast food, travel fast, learn fast, earn fast, retire fast and do what? Not sure!!...This mantra broke and continues to loosen its grip on me. Richard's eco home was another dent in my belief system and the old mantras loosened its grip even further and I am about to break its shackles. The morning at the eco home started with a visit to the composting toilet. A walk away from the main living area, it reminded me of the villages back in India. This trip followed by the nice mint tea which I relished especially the strong flavour of the mint leaves from Richard’s wild garden in the making. Richard then introduced me to his workshop participants who were there in the woods to learn the art of making wooden chairs. It was the 4^th day into the workshop and the girls already looked pro in their work. Observing them I understood the patience needed to transform the unruly logs into neatly shaped obedient wooden legs which when compressed, heated and pressed will create a beautiful sitting chair. As one participant rightly said, the wood work is a therapeutic process as it is an awesome way to release stress. As I wondered and pondered around the woods I asked myself, Can I slow down to the rhythm of life? Can I just be and flow? How easy it is to live a simple life full of care for self and others? Can I live like Rich for the rest of my life?

3)      Cooking is a process of collaboration and team work. It can be nourishing when we eat and share together.

I felt welcomed in Richard’s humble eco home. I was very conscious to not disturb the flow of the workshop and just be a silent observer absorbing the activities around me. So just before the lunch time I offered to knead the dough for the evening Pizza meal. I also helped cut the logs of wood for the fire place. Richard helped me with the proportions and I used my Indian Chapatti (flat bread in India) making skills to knead the dough. As the conversations and stories of cultures blended, my dough got kneaded and the wood logs got chopped. I had brought with me Indian savouries called ‘Batata wada’ which are mashed potatoes fried with gram flour. The coriander chutney side was an instant hit and recipe got exchanged and thus the culture travelled once again through small notes of love and care.

4)       The ecological path of an offgridder is tough with huge hurdles to cross for simple gains.

The composting toilets are not the most convenient to use. The smoke from the wooden stove made my eyes water and nose run. The rain water harvested is probably not the cleanest and needs boiling before use. The winters are the toughest according to Richard as he spends most time indoors. A life in the woods can be socially isolating and uneasy at times with urges to give up and quit constantly seducing you. But then I question, I am yet to see a strong person who has not been through tough challenges in life. The ecological path is probably an uncomfortable one but luxuries in life is definitely not what I am after anyways!

5)      The nights are starry and the owls are scary!

The evening started with heating the wooden oven to make Pizzas. We cut the vegetables needed for the Pizzas and I relying once again on my chapatti making skills rolled the dough into round Pizza bread. The roller, spoons and spatulas along with the big clay oven/wood fired oven was made by Richard.  The fences which divided the spaces between kitchen, workshop and party area were also made by Richard’s wood crafted hands. Wining and dining the music intoxicated the air. With experimental Pizza toppings and music the evening moved into darkness. The owls whispered closer than ever. For the first time I heard owls whisper and they whisper like humans but definitely sound scarier!! The night in the caravan was a bit uncomfortable. I realised how quickly I get used to the city noise. I need noise around me to sleep. How ironical. The deep darkness and the whisper less silence of the woods was a bit unnerving to sleep alone. Knowing Richard is a shout away in the next shack I cajoled myself into sleeping. The next morning started with the Indian style masala omelette and the stories of life continued around wood work, tea and wooden smoke. I noticed how quickly I got used to the new way of eco-living. As I returned to London on the train I told myself, I can confidently say I at least now know one wooden path to an eco-living.

 

A peak into sustainable living

Weekend before last I went camping in the woods of Stroud, a small village in Gloustershire in UK. I have started enjoying camping and sleeping under the million starred clear skies which I was fortunate to experience as it was a clear, sunny weekend !!... The camp site was at the SEED festival organised by Hawkwood college , a college focused on Adult Education, Inner journey and our connection to others and planet earth . The SEED festival had speakers , musicians , artists from across the globe !!..I witnessed unanimous language of caring for Nature... There was theatre with themes centred around sustainability , songs by environmentalists which spread the message of connection to ourselves and earth. the songs had political humour on world politics . I never though music could be used in such effective way to spread a message. Loved the innovation there !! I heard live music from different parts of the world, Africa, Cuban music , Native American music and music of the New Zealand tribes !!

The key learning for me was that developed nations like UK and US have started realising their mistake of taking lead in industrialization. Industrialization which has created this disconnect from self to self , self to other and self to nature and planet earth !!!.... Seeing only profit and resources utilization and only taking from earth and not giving anything in return has led to the challenge that world is facing in the form of climate change , terrorism and forms of illnesses like depression where self feels disconnected and isolated.
I saw shoots of hope where across Europe new communities are starting to emerge in the form of eco villages where people living in the village build their own eco friendly housing , generate their own energy, grow their own food , harvest water can create their own compost. I met quite a few people who are living in these eco villages and are living much fulfilled lifestyles even though money does not rule their life. People living a life of enough and not hoarding and greed. I wish to see such eco villages take shape in India. I visited auroville in Pondicherry few years back which is such eco village but we need more courageous people to take the leap of faith and set up more of such villages. I realised India has to stop aping the west blindly. There is wisdom in our culture to care for each other and respect nature. We need to preserve that and bring this ancient wisdom into action. We need to buy fruits and vegetables from the local Bhaaji wala and not from super markets. We need have water harvesting schemes as part of every society and community. Our villages are much more connected and rich. We need to build the self esteem of our villagers that living in a mud house , eating home grown food and knowing your neighbour on a first name or even pet name basis is what makes you rich and not the bank balance , big car and so called metro lifestyle which village kids have now started craving for. Indians should remember that we are 1/6th population of the world. If all of us start living unsustainably , we are only speeding the process of self destruction as human species. I saw a ray of hope in Europe through the Seed festival and eco villagers I met on the weekend. I am yet to see that ray of hope in India.

The new me speaks

The journey from head to heart travelled
Never complete I realised , it's a beautiful dance on the rhythm of life
The next step is to include the hands in this dance
Take actions in alignment of the trinity of head, heart and hands
surrendering in each moment to what is waiting to unfold
Its not my to own or claim but be a catalyst in the making whole
As the making of the wholeness heals the maker
I just want to see this wholeness manifest
Oh What a healing journey my life would be then
This is the inspiration I hold in my heart for the year to begin.

Happy new Year to each and all :-) !!

Michael , The Carpet Cleaner

I am struggling to write my paper on economic learning from plant's intelligence and as usual I ask for guidance from the universe. And the answers appear in the form of Michael , the carpet cleaner mid afternoon !!

Last weekend had the carpet shampooing and cleaning activity taken at the place where I live. Michael was the cleaner , cleaning the carpets. My aunty invited him to join us for a cup of tea and that's how I started the conversation with him.

Michael , a very ordinary looking , African origin man taught me a few valuable lessons in the short 30 minutes chat I had with him. It turns out that every person I connect with has a beautiful triumph story to tell and Michael was no exception.

He suffered from a throat cancer and the doctors had given him 6 months to live . This was 3 yrs ago and as on today he stands completely cured of cancer , smiling and teaching me and others some very important life lessons.

So what did Michael teach me on that Sunday afternoon ?

1) Look at every challenge in life as a gift :

Michael had this inkling before being diagnosed with cancer to slow down and review his life. But he carried on till life chose cancer to show him this message and this time he listened. He asked a very critical question . In my world empowering , quality question. What gift does this cancer have for me ? And the answer was : I need to learn self expression and channel my creativity. And so he did. In the spare time he had because he was off sick and in bed , he started making hats of all sorts. This way he channelled his creativity. He chose to look at cancer as a gift and learn the message the challenge had for him.

2) We are connected and one :

Michael got into a self healing mode and got introduced to alternative healing techniques like Reiki. He told me about his experiments with self healing using Reiki and how all is just pure energy. Behind our colours , our personalities we are connected beautiful souls and that we have forgotten this and now trying to remember. I shared with him what my study has been on oneness and interconnectedness and that I want to bring this perspective into ways we do business and the way we structure organisations . He reaffirmed the necessity of this new idea and inspired me to continue working on my paper and not give up !!

3) Prayers do get answered , only if we are ready to listen :

My conditioning taught me something about people from his origin. My conditioning also taught me about poor people probably do not have the intelligence to understand me and so it is below my dignity to connect. How wrong was I ? Had I believed and acted based on my conditioning I would have missed the answer to my call from the Universe in the form of Michael. Had I chosen to not chat with him and my cup of tea to my room to drink would have needed a new lesson to be learnt there. I am glad I chose to listen beyond my belief system and I am glad so did Michael !! I learnt to be humble . I learnt that I am on the right path of writing my paper and that I need to be patient with my self. Ask the question and wait for the answers !!

I hugged Michael and he hugged me back. He inspired me that day and I thanked him for being who has been in the face of the challenging cancer. He humbly responded. As I have lessons for you, you have lessons for me and this tea chat is synchronicity at it’s best. We both chose to learn and listen.

I am truly blessed and guided is all I know now !!

The power of Asking and holding quality questions

It's that day of self reflection for me today. In the very beginning of this year I started with asking a question .'how do economic laws align to universal laws ?' This question had crept up from deep within me to align my new values to new world of possibilities. It evolved from my fear of the unknown and letting of the comfort zone of my job. It came from a deep turmoil I felt to not enjoy materialistic conversations with my friends and family where job titles/ salary / 2,3,4 bedroom apartments / children's prestigious schooling /clothing had stopped driving and exciting me in life. The fear of being left alone as I had not much to contribute to the latest gossips /and not up-breast with the latest politics and happenings of the world. I chose to still hold the question , prayed for guidance and what opened up for me was a 8 month course in ecological leadership and facilitation which I am at present doing from Schumacher college in Devon, UK.The question connected me to 30 other people with similar questions across the world of 10 different nationalities. I realised I am not alone and the question deepened and took a new form. During my wilderness time in nature which we did a lot during the time of the course it dawned on me that nature manifests universal laws so impeccably. Plants, trees and animals are here on this planet some 1.8 billions years before we human beings !!... It came to me to now learn from nature . As all previous questions have stirred me inside and rocked and shook me completely this learning from nature meant spending more time in nature for a city girl born in Mumbai .I had to overcome the fear of sleeping on the grass , overcome my fear of insects. I bought a sleeping bag , borrowed a tent and slept in the million starred hotel in the comfort of the grass and what and experience it was !!.. My question also let me to deep dive , this time literally scuba diving . I did an introductory class of scuba diving in the Mediterranean sea. How to learn from nature is my next quality question. I have already attended a plant consciousness conference and have been drawn to shamanism and learning from native American and Indigenous tribes across the world.

Why did I choose to write this people is to just demonstrate how far within and wide holding a powerful , quality question can take you. It is a matter of choice which question I choose to engage in.It's a matter of awareness and self respect to choose quality questions which empower me and others. My experience so far with this journey has been to go with the life force of quality questions. What I need is the courage to deep dive within and without !! I choose to follow the unfolding of possibilities and trust , clear intention and an open heart filled with wonder. What next I ask and I am ready to deep dive once again !!!